The second love, "phileo" or "philia" love is a more "brotherly" expression. Of course it is where we get the city name of "Philadelphia"...but more significantly it is the sweet love shared among people who are pulling together to accomplish a mutual goal...a husband and wife bonded together to start and raise a family...build not just a house but a home...doing life together. Countrymen fighting for the common cause of defending freedom or a way of life. A group of people aspiring to start a new church or ministry to a community in need and sticking with it even when disagreements abound.
This love is a tough love that doesn't easily let go when trials come to test its mettle. When put to the fire it comes out shining like gold. Stubborn in its best moments, phileo love allows us to see it through when we want to give it up ...find a new companion when the current relationship sours. But, oh the rewards for "stick-to-it-tive-ness". When we press on in the times when the object of our phileo love is zigging and we're zagging, we will come to the other side of the matter...and what we find is not simply a relationship restored, but a relationship reinforced. We are not simply over it...we are stronger and closer because of it...forged in the fires of trials while blinded by a darkness that might have prevented us from valuing the other's viewpoint like we ought to have...but we valued it anyway. Now we are closer than we've ever been...and it will take far more to separate our paths this time around.
The value of a phileo friendship tested is measured only by heaven. Not based on mutual attraction, but based on mutual goals. When compared to "storge", phileo is an equally beautiful and more mature love...and those who find it...find a good thing. So to my church I say...I phileo you!