When Kathy and I first got married, I thought there'd be so many opportunities to be her knight in shining armor...you know...her hero. Somehow it hasn't turned out that way. Pretty much if I stop on the way home from the office to pick up a gallon of milk, I'm the man! But a few nights ago I got my shot. We'd just settled in a bit and put the kids to bed, when Kathy heard a scratching at the door. "Can you go check it out?" A hero op, if ever there was one. Heart pounding...adrenaline rushing, I crept to the front door and turned on the front porch light to see if anything/one was lurking outside, making a "scratching" sound...nothing. Just then, Kathy heard it coming from the back door, "There it is!" I heard it too, and it kinda freaked me out...but I didn't let on...I walked toward the back door...but then I had to smile when I notice what had been making all the ruckus. Defintitely not a life and death scenario, so I start to open the door to "take care" of the problem. "Don't OPEN it!" Kathy hadn't yet figured out what was making the noise, which was fine with me since I figured it would enhance the whole "hero effect" I was going for. At any rate, for her, opening the door was not an acceptable course of action. But since I'd seen the nuisance, no big deal. I'm not real sure what the 8th plague looked like to all those Egyptians (Ex. 10:4). I can say that just one locust can create quite a stir for a couple of Americans. So, ignoring her protest I opened the door to scoot the little creature toward a tree, but when I did, it flew low and hard into the house and "kamakazied" into a nearby shoe. Kathy did NOT like that at all! She'd convinced herself that the culprit was a rat or chipmunk which are obviously predatory life forms, so she screamed, jumped up on a chair and started yelling at me...AT ME! "Why did you do that!?!?! You let it in...Why did you do that!?!?" I stood there staring at her, shocked that somehow I'm getting blamed for this and there she is on a chair with this horrified, disappointed look on her face. But just then it darted upward and landed on my shirt...and that's just not right...gave me the heebie jeebies! I ran out of the house dancing, yelling and swatting at the little critter. Finally, I knocked it out into the night and ran back in the house and quickly shut the door...there...problem solved...for that she hugged me...her hero. Funny how things turn out. Incidentally, I am happy to report that wife and locust are doing well. What made me think of all this was that a second ago I heard a locust on the pine tree just outside my window...he sounded kinda terrified.
